Scrabled Eggs Deidara
by GaaralovesAki
Summary: Deidara and you are good friends ... but he wants to know if it could be more


Name: Jesshika

Name: Jesshika

Nick Name: Jessi

"Hey FUCKING BITCH, come back with my amulet!!" Hidan hollered down the hall, chasing Jesshika.

"Why would I do that, fucking-tard? It's funny seeing you squirm over this stupid necklace," Jesshika retorted holding it over the toilet.

"Fucking Bitch, I swear that if you flush it you will die an excruciating death!" he said his eyes setting a flame.

"Ya'll are too loud, unn! It's too early in the morning, yeah!" Deidara said walking by the bathroom. "Jessi, give him back his amulet. I, for one, don't feel like cleaning up the bloody pulp of a friend and team mate, un." He stroked his hand through Jesshika's hair and tossed the necklace back to Hidan.

"That fucking douche-bag took it right off my neck when I was taking a fucking nap!" Hidan grumped slipping the medallion back on. "Don't touch my stuff, Mother Fucker!" he walked to the dining area.

Jessi smiled, "I thought that he should eat with everybody else, Dei-kun!" Feeling a tongue on her ear she started to blush deeply. "Ummm, Dei-kun?"

"Huh? What is it?" He asked not seeing her face redden every second.

"Ummm... Do you mind? ... My ear..." She started, pointing to his hand.

"Sorry,un! I didn't realize ... well lets go eat, yeah?" he said moving his hand and smelling the air. "Smells like Zetsu's been cooking ... Great ..." he said wrinkling his nose in distaste.

'The fucker doesn't even realize that I like him!' Jesshika thought. "Dei-kun, what would you do if I went out with someone?" She asked bluntly without thinking. "Oh, never mind."

Deidara stopped in his tracks and stared at her wide-eyed. 'What is she talking about? ... Does she like HIDAN!?' "Why would you even ask?"

"I thought that I said 'Never mind' Mother fucker!" She gritted her teeth running downstairs. "Zetty! ... I don't want to eat you're meat! ... I'll cook!"

'Why does she have a mouth like Hidan?' Dei mentally sighed and walked down the stairs glumly.

"Deidara-senpai! Why is you so gloomy looking?" Tobi called from the table. "Come sit, sit!" he said patting the chair next to him.

"Unn!" Dei answered.

"Awww ... don't be like that 'Deidara-senpai'..." Jessi said with an evil smirk. "Go on Dei-kun, sit and relax." She waved her hand dismissively. "I'm making breakfast. The only thing missing from this 'breakfast' is something other than meat!" She said glaring at Zestu. "Why don't you ever make anything else? I know that you're a cannibal, but it doesn't mean that everybody else is... they need a variety of different food... Dip-shit!"

"If you don't like my cooking that's your own fault, not mine!" Zestu commented. "I, for one, love my cooking."

"Yet again, they need more than just meat, Dip-shit face!"

"What ever! Just give us food, WOMEN!" Hidan interrupted. "I want my food, NOW!" He commented, again, slamming his fork into the table.

"Fine, you FUCKING PROCUPINE SCREWER!" she said throwing the plate at his head, but it hit the wall behind him, shattering. "Take your stupid breakfast! ... Anybody else want to rush me?!"

The Akatsuki just stared at her in disbelief, 'Damn... When did she become this bad?' thought Hidan. "What the FUCK is your problem??"

Jessi ignored him and continued cooking, "Who wants what, now?" she called through the walls.

"FOOD!" they shouted in unison.

'Not a very picky bunch, are they?' she pondered scrambling the eggs.

**.: Meanwhile at the table outta earshot of Jessi :.**

"Deidara-senpai, you still never told me what's wrong..." Tobi whispered.

"Unn," Dei responded.

"Deidara-senpai! TELLL ME! Tobi is a good boy, and won't tell nobody!" Tobi begged, getting on his knees.

"Just leave me alone, TOBI, YEAH?!" Deidara said slapping the back of Tobi's head.

"Owie, Tobi is a good boy, Deidara-senpai," Tobi said rubbing his head. "At times, I think that the only person you show compassion to is Jessi-senpai..."

Deidara stiffened as he heard this fact.

"Here guys!" Jessi said coming from the kitchen, balancing plates, full of food, on her arms and head.

**.: Back in the Kitchen :.**

"Why can't the Fuck-tard catch a hint?" Jessi said to herself.

She picked up all the plates and brought them out. "Here guys!"

"At times, I think that the only person you show compassion to is Jessi-senpai..." Tobi said rubbing the back of his head.

"Jessi! You're going to spill everything!" Dei said rushing to help.

"You have no faith in my balance do you Dei-kun..." Jessi said pouting. "But thanks for your help," she smiled warmly at Dei.

"Would you two mind not making me LOOSE my APPETITE!!" Stated Pein.

"HUSH UP! ... You're name suits you very well! ..." Jessi retorted.

"Why is that?"

"Because you're a pain in my FUCKING ASS(!!) YOU BASTARD!!" She screamed. "Here You FUCKING Mother Porcupine SCREWERS!" She said slamming the plates to the table. "Enjoy your fucking MEAL!" she ran up the stairs to her room. 'This fucking sucks monkeys' dicks!'

"Deidara-senpai... You should go get her..." Tobi said shoveling scrambled eggs and bacon in his mouth. "She seems to only listen to you when she's like this."

They all nodded their head in agreement. "Nuh-uhh! Tobi you can too, UN!" Dei tried to defend.

"Tobi is a good boy, and thinks that you should go, not Tobi."

Deidara sighs and goes up the stairs two-at-a-time and stops in front of Jessi's room. Knocking softly, "Hey Jessi, I'm coming in, UN!"

"Dei-kun! ..." She started turning scarlet, "I-I have something tha-" She was stopped by Deidara's kiss on her lips.

"Don't speak, just go with it, yeah?" he said kissing the nape of her neck laying her down on the bed.

Jessi laughing, "I wouldn't have it any other way!"

The Akatsuki hearing many thuds and thumps asked, "Tobi... You knew that would happen if Deidara went up there didn't you?"

Tobi just said in a happy voice, "Tobi is a Good boy!"


End file.
